Dave Barry ruined my life

So here I am in the middle of the night thinking, because Amber has decided that since she cant find her book light that instead of going to another room for post sex reading before she goes to sleep she will just turn the light on in our room while I'm post sex sleeping as is MY ritual. Either way, I was thinking about how people argue that T.V. damages impressionable young adults. For much of my life I have disagreed on the claim that a person is intelligent enough to wade through the made up muck and go on with their lives in a mature aware of the consequences kinda way. Tonight on the other hand I think of the line that influenced me more than any other in my life. I don't know how many of you remember life with Dave a sitcom based on the life of columnist Dave Barry. Well I was an impressionable young adult when that show was on the air and one fateful day Dave said " Kids, taking sex off the ironing board and putting it back into the bedroom where it belongs." WOW! YOU CAN HAVE SEX ON AN IRONING BOARD! says my young impressionable mind. To this day I have tried to find a way to master the art of this. A passion that lead to cuts, bruises, and sprains until I finally gave up (mostly because amber said no freaking way, absolutely not, never again!) I'm not sure how to make an exclamation point angry but if you would imagine it that way you will get a better picture. Anyway so here I am at one o'clock in the morning pondering a scenario that will never come to to fruition and thinking damn you Dave Barry.

Waiting sucks

So I have been waiting very patiently for my real estate license to arrive so I can actually start working. During this period where I am not legally able to do the work to get paid people keep informing me just how difficult real estate really is, typically this is followed by the story about how their friend with the drug problem, or downs syndrome, or erectile dysfunction gave it a shot and failed miserably. Obviously this tells me that real estate is no joke but, none the less I forge on. I do have to admit, the comments were starting to give me some doubts and there were even a few times I second guessed my decision to jump head first into the unkown. That was until I went to real estate school and met the competition. Allow me to explain.
In the interest of not hurting feelings I will leave out names and use the pseudonym dumb ass for the subject of ridicule.

foreword: Steven is sitting idly in real estate school doodling in the coloring book they issued to learn real estate from. Suddenly like global warming in crappy Dennis Quaid movies an idiot speaks with chilling and deadly ferocity!

Dumb ass: So how does it work when those crazy old ladies leave their house to their cat?

Instructor: What does this have to do with real estate

Dumb ass: Ooohhhh! Right! cause the cat can't OWN!

Me in my head: WTF!

Scene.

That was the day my doubts left me. Now wish me on luck on getting my license sometime before the world ends in 2012, but that's another blog.

in the begining

So it seems just a short time ago I was sitting in my apartment in college drinking beer eating ramen and wondering what to do with my life. Seven years later here I am going wow that went fast! My big girl is killing snakes in the name of the pope, my little sweet baby has started talking back and Im doing my best to pretend that I am in some kind of control over the whole thing. I guess I realized that I should just get out of the way of the things I think I know so mabey I can learn some stuff i.e. snakes flibber-flobber not slither and that no matter how fond my memories are if she dosent like root beer, root beer floats will be just as disgusting. So here is to alternative education and the no parent left behind act.